We all have had close friends and best friends in school and college.I have written about my own close friends before. My best friend from college(apart from the HD of course) is U. U lives in India and is married to her best friend from college ;).
She and HD have always been my mirrors on the wall.When you are married to your best friend, it becomes difficult to separate the two roles.Some times, I need an un-biased opinion( i.e.someone who is on my side :)). So I always always turn to U- despite the time difference and the distance .
All is well and good - except this-She lives so far away and I cant seem to make close friends anymore.I think of every friend I have made since then or even before.No one comes close.It was different in school though. Best friends kept changing..I guess it was all part of growing up..
Like I wrote before, U and I met as freshmen(women?). We had this peculiar bonding since day 1. Since she was in a different discipline , we would meet only in the hostel. I went through phases of fitting into different "gangs" through the 4 years of college and so did she.The one constant factor was our bonding.We did not hang out together or go to the canteen together. In fact,no one knew that we were best friends. People used to be shocked when I tell them that U is best friend.
I cant seem to bond like that with anyone anymore.What has changed? Am I too old to form new best friends? or have I set the bar too high?
I guess I am in one of my rambling moods today. I have so many things in mind that I would like to talk to someone about, but my best friend is asleep on the other side of the continent! Nothing major - just little things that no one else will "get".
so, tell me- do you still hang on to your college/ school best friends? or have you formed new ones? Am I the only weirdo around here?
Count Dracula- Book Review
4 years ago
9 comments:
Hey
I can very much empathize. It is difficult to make such strong friends when are older bcos all our personalities are very well developed and we become more critical and less vulnerable.
I do perfectly understand the urges to talk, nothing but everything under the sun. :--)
Be assured you are not the only weirdo. ;--)
heyy u nr not alone..
am not able to make new friends...or i lack the inclination to get close to ppl....as in friends yes they r...but not tht close to heart feeling...no more besttt friends or dear friends...stopped with HCL times....i sumtimes think it aplies to all women who married their best friends.....:)
I really like to read your blog. It is like I can connect with you through your thoughts.
You are the only one. I am in the same boat like you do. My friend is back home and when I really need to talk to someone there is no one to call. Look around, you are not the only one in the boat.
Sorry.. I wanted to say "You are not the only one".
"Am I too old to form new best friends? "
I would like to say yes;).
And I get new friends. See the actual reason I think is you simply dont have the time. You are married etc.
@ SK and MK,
Thanks!
@ anaon,
thanks and welcome here.. if you feel connected to me, why not leave a name ? :)
@ b2bok,
veve to you!
jokes apart, you maybe right. maybe it is a question of available time for socializing..
no - everything has a shelf life, friendship does too
as you grow up - the dynamic isnt what it used to be
and you are on the money - when you say with time - everything changes
cheers
i sort of agree with Deepak here - things change over time - if you are conscious of the changes and both people in the relationship make a constant effort to understand each other despite the changes, the shelf life of the friendship can be longer. There is a shelf life, for sure.
My school friends - we were a group of four - each one so very different now. It's hard to keep up with changes, especially when you are not living close by - but there is something magical about how we all start from wherever we left off, even after a gap of a year or two. There is a strange comfort that one feels with old friends - even if they don't understand your life anymore. The point being, you are not a weirdo at all :)
Same pinch!Although I've moved two oceans apart from my school friends and although I did manage to make a few friends here,I still call those at home as my best friends.And happy or sad,its them that I want to call and talk.
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